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When he finally came it felt like heaven. I felt his fingers dig deeper into my waist and he thrust erratically, one hand working my clit until I clenched desperately around him.“Fuck, Ally!”He released deep inside me, jerking over and over, his hot come filling my ass. I came again just from the feeling of it as his cock throbbed and spurted for what seemed like forever. I felt him finally soften and he eased out of me, his weight possessive as he moved to lie down half on top of me and half beside me. His hand was still between my legs and I pushed it away gently.“Happy now?” I asked.He let out a sigh.“Fucking ecstatic.”We lay there a moment and I eased out from under him. The bed was small so we lay close together.“There’s just one thing I don’t get,” he breathed.“What?” I asked.He frowned.“I mean, you say you met him five times. How’d you let him fuck your ass so easily?”I blanched. The afterglow had been brutally extinguished.“I – it all happened so fast.”“I mean, here I am,”. Yeah, I understand.”Her: “And distance, as well.”Me: “Fine. But can I ask you one last question?”Her: “Go ahead.”Me: “What are you calculating the velocity of, anyway?”A man goes to a costume party wearing nothing but his underwear and a woman on his back.His friends see him and ask “Hey man, what are you supposed to be?”He replies “Oh, I’m dressed as a turtle”His friend responds “A turtle? How are you supposed to be a turtle? And who is that woman on your back?”The man replies “Oh, that’s Michelle” –Thank Phoenix for the following.‎ Three men were travelling in Europe and happened to meet at a bar in London, England. One man was from the US, one from France and one from Canada. They got acquainted and started talking about their problems with their wives.The American began by saying: “I told my wife in no uncertain terms that from now on she would have to do all the cooking. Well the first day after I told her, I saw nothing. The second day I saw nothing. But on the third day when I.
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